Right now, I am: Wearing: I'm in me under-roos!. (Not that you wanted to hear that.) Hair: Pink, though blond is starting to show. Listening to: They Might Be Giants Eating/drinking: Diet Coke Thinking about: Psoriasis sucks.

I got a crush Copy shop clerk But she won't look up at me Don't want to be known as the freak Who just comes around to catch her eye -- They Might Be Giants, 'Sleeping in the Flowers'

I seriously think that women are the better sex. Women, in general, have such a greater capacity for feeling and creativity--I feel like a neanderthal in comparison. I feel sorry that women have to settle for men, except of course for the lesbians and bisexuals--they got it together!

Except for the whole having-to-be-with-men part, being a woman seems preferable to being a man. If a woman wants to be feminen and 'womanly', she can. And if she wants to wear men's clothes and plays sports, she can. And if she wants to do both, hey, that's not a problem either. Ah, but I'm a guy. I have to watch monday night football and engage in long discussions with other men as to whether women should spit or swallow. But I'm not trying to sound bitter or resentful or anything. Men were the ones who restricted women from being anything but housewifes, but women don't do the opposite to men. Men restrict themselves in social roles, too. So while men have loosened up on women in the workplace and sports, men can't be gay or a crossdresser without being ostracized. Talk about 'boys will be boys.'

So am I saying I want to be a crossdresser? No, I'm not sure what the fuck I'm saying, to be honest! I wish the 'definition' of a man wasn't so fucking strict and stupid. I'm tired of the (true) stereotype of men being sexist pigs. I'm tired of sex having to be dirty. That's not entirely the fault of overbearing parents who shelter their children, it's the fucking fault of men having to be men because they have no other choice. Most of all, I hate that it's in me. I hate that I WANT sex to be mindless, animalistic, and degrading. (I wrote a poem about this, it's not hard to guess which one.)

I think it'd be cool to be able to be a girl for one day. Being a fat male I'm severely limited in my style and choice of clothes. And I just think it would fucking rock to spend a day as a girl and do all the shit that a guy can't even think about without feeling some stupid guilt or shame.